Preparedness Has Been Achieved!

4 Pigs, 3 Deer and Me!

It's been a long hunting season (just as the wife), but a good one. I look forward to helping everyone with their gun and ammo needs and hopefully pick up a few new customers along the way. Give me a shout and let's talk "turkey" . . .that's the next season for hunting here in Texas!

Easy Lollipop Valentines

Easy Lollipop Valentines

This a very easy and cute idea for all you guys with school age kids. I think I'll make them for the office "kids"!

Lewisville Citizen Police Academy

In 2001 my husband and I moved from Jacksonville, Florida to Lewisville, Texas, even though he had sworn that he would NEVER live in North Texas. But since I am a native Texan, and the wife - I won the war! When looking for a new home. We had a few priorities – a one story, 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, 2 car garage in a nice neighborhood. We settled on Lewisville. We bought a nice home on a cul-de-sac near Memorial Park.
We found the neighbors to be nice and friendly. 4th of July parties, new friends (Even Fire Chief Lasky lived next door). Life was good! We had made a good choice! Lewisville, Texas was home.
Eight years later I decided to participate in the Lewisville Citizen Police Academy, as my husband had the year before. During the class, my rose colored glasses were shattered.

These are a few of the details I learned about my city.
► In 2008 over 5,000 people were arrested for various offenses.

►There are actual prostitution houses in upscale neighborhoods, along with a few “crack” houses in the less prestigious part of our city, demonstrating that crime knows no boundaries.

► Not every one wants police protection, even the woman who has been beaten on many occasions by her husband or boyfriend and refuses to press charges.

►There are more than 55 sex offender in the 42 square miles that Lewisville encompasses.

► We are home to 6 gangs with the youngest gang member being only 12 years old.

My question to the class was, “Who would have known that this small city would have these challenges?”

And then “Why don’t we the citizens know about these issues?”

The answer I received was politics versus reality. It’s the Chamber of Commerce syndrome. Chambers are comprised of businesses whose goal it is to further the interest of businesses within the community.
So why would the city publicize the challenges that are not only a part of Lewisville, but every city.

So how does a city like Lewisville confront it’s reality?
By using these avenues:

Community Programs like the Neighborhood Watch Program, Law Enforcement Exploring Program for youth and the School Resource Officer Program.
Informing our citizens using the city’s website with eAlert subscriptions, Chief Kerbow’s weekly update and ability to know where in the city Sex Offenders reside
AND Educating our citizens through . . . the very class we just completed.

I want to let you know that we are a very fortunate city. We have a very dedicated group of people who take these challenges personally . . . 24 hours a day . . . 365 days a year.
They are the hardworking, distinguished men and women of the Lewisville Police Department.
With the guidance of Chief Kerbow, we have officers like SWAT Commander Lt. Kendall Lynn, Detective Robert Feagins, K-9 Officer Shane Menz (my favorite)

And our class’s mentor, the legendary Training Officer Scott Pedigo: Along with many others in the Lewisville Police Department who spend more than their fair share of time, effort and energy to balance politics and reality making Lewisville, Texas a city where everyone would want to live.

I learned a tremendous amount about our city and our outstanding Police Department. It is my personal mission and I hope it is yours also, to recommend this class to all Lewisville citizens every chance we get. And to warn them of Officer Pedigo, the consummate class clown!

Operation Write Home

Looking on the right side of my blog is a link to Operation Write Home. . .so why is it there?
After picking up a flyer at a scrapbook convention this summer in Austin, TX and knowing that our team at JCPenney was looking for volunteer projects, I put the two together and approached our volunteer committee with the idea. Last Thursday, December 3rd, at our monthly department, we put together 120 Valentine's cards. The cards will be sent to our troops, so they can send a card to their loved ones back home. Hallmark hasn't expanded their operations to the Middle East!

If you are a scrapbooker you too can make a small difference in the lives of our troops. Click on the link and get started!

Oh, I almost forgot - Any Hero Cards - there is also an opportunity to send cards to "Any Hero". This explains it best...News from the homefront—even from strangers—is a treasure to those far from home. "Hero Mail is great," says one Chaplain. "I go out and pray with the soldiers before missions and I hand out Hero Mail." Letters are distributed to those who rarely get mail, or to those most in need of encouragement the day the box arrives. "It helps to know that we are remembered!"

My Version of Turkey Trot

First you get up early, have a hearty breakfast, put on your running shoes, and get your grocery ads, coupons and GO!

First stop, Wally World. Swanson chicken broth .45¢ a can, grab 12 cans total $5.4. Next, Green Giant vegetables corn and beans. 50¢ a can, grab another 12 cans $6.00. The great deer/pig hunter wants Ham. So what if we have 2 pigs worth of meat in the freezer we want spiral cut grocery store ham! Wally World has the cheapest per pound – grabbed a BIG one! OK, so it’s not a turkey, but the ham will be eaten on Turkey Day.

Second stop, Albe’s. If you buy $20 worth of groceries you get a turkey for .33¢ a pound! OK, so here I get soda’s, Diet Mt. Dew – 4 twelve packs for $10. Find the frozen veggies – 10/$10 - met the $20 mark and now we get a 20lb Turkey for .33¢ a pound and away we go!

Third stop, Kroger! Kroger has really good fresh veggies and a turkey for .33¢ pound if you buy $20 worth of groceries . . . I buy onion, celery, potatoes, mushrooms, apples, bananas and for good measure I throw in a roast for when the ham and turkey gets to be too much. Get another 20 lb turkey for .33¢ a lb!

Final stop, Tom Thumb to finish up Thanksgiving Dinner shopping. Well, when you spend $25 here you get turkey for .33¢ a pound. Who says there’s no price fixing? Get all the rest of ingredients for a little more than $25 and don’t forget the turkey! Another 20 pounder.

Get home – forgot the freezer door is blocked by a wet vac, a compressor and 3,000 sheets of plywood – thinking how in the world am I going to get all these turkeys in the freezer! Thank goodness I have a wonderful daughter that lives about 1.7 miles from the house. As she pulls up, she is laughing at her mom standing in the garage surrounded by turkeys! Get it?!?! We move the compressor, the vacuum and then start to wiggle the plywood far enough to the side to get the door open just wide enough to stuff those birds in.

The birds are in, the groceries are put away and dog-gone-it, the real “Turkey Trotters” may run a mile or two but I’ve covered 4 grocery stores in 5 square miles, moved 3,000 pieces of plywood and I have 1 ham, 3 turkeys and all the fixin's for Thanksgiving Dinnerto show for it. The real “Turkey Trotters” just have sore muscles! I think I like my Turkey Trot better!

Neiman Marcus Catalog Shoppin'

Peaches: Woo Hoo!! The new Neiman Marcus Christmas catalog just came out. Does anyone have a couple hundred grand I can borrow??

Earlene: No, honey I don’t, this well has run dry, but I’ll send you the SEARS catalog and let you pick something really special from it. Will that work?

Peaches: I was hoping for a Cupcake Car for Christmas!

Dolly Mae: This will make you laugh! They made a mistake on one of Tar-Ja Product Descriptions. It is a computer screen cleaner that can be washed gently – it comes as a dog, cat, dick and bear. Which one would you like for Christmas?

Peaches: OMG I have to go see that for myself . . .Because that is funny!

Earlene: You girls stop right now. I don’t want to read another one of “Dolly Mae’s” blogs about THIS conversation.

Dolly Mae: Keep it going chicky – I need new material for my blog so more people will read it and I can start collecting pennies from Google Heaven.

Earlene: I didn’t find the screen cleaner BUT I found an electric cork screw!!!! Hmmmmmm.

Peaches: LOL ya’ll are funny! I did a general search of the website and didn’t find any screen cleaners . . . so I think someone’s imagining things they want for Christmas.

Dolly Mae: NOT this chick – maybe you two? I’ve got cobwebs older than ya’ll.

Dolly Mae: The screen cleaner hasn’t made it to the Christmas on-line tab...But what about a new product “The Electric Dick Screen Cleaner Cork Screw”?

Peaches: Yes, Dolly Mae the Christmas Book is online . . . HELLO, put your glasses on and look at the subject line of the emails!

Dolly Mae: I am talking about the Tar-Ja on-line.

Peaches: I thought we were still shopping at Neiman Marcus.

Dolly Mae: No, No, No, the Neiman Marcos one is probably raccoon lined and we can’t afford that one. Maybe Wally World will come out with one that is rabbit lined and it will be cheaper.

Earlene: Does the“The Electric Dick Screen Cleaner Cork Screw”? REALLY get rid of the cobwebs????

Dolly Mae: Dust, cobwebs, creatures of the male persuasion!

Earlene: If I order within the next 10 minutes, will my offer be DOUBLED???

Dolly Mae: I THOUGHT you would need AT least 2...

Earlene: YEEEEEEEE HAWWWWWWW!!!!!! Can I give you my pre-paid debit card number??? I just got it yesterday from one of those check cashin’ places. Do you take an El Master Cardo?

Peaches: El Master Cardo, Really??? I might have to get one of those to pay for the Bubba's new gently used teeth.

Peaches: This is quickly going turning into a conversation I am not sure I want to have with you two gals.

Earlene: Oh c’mon, Peaches……………….you know we can converse about ANYTHING!!!!

Peaches: ANYTHING??? I am not so sure Dolly May wants to hear about anything, because that could include everything..... She might stick her fingers in her ears and start yelling ..."LALALALALALA". I think Dolly Mae would have a stroke and then we would have to sell the “The Electric Dick Screen Cleaner Cork Screw” to keep her in the home!

Dolly Mae: I have a thought – ya’ll should go into business ‘cus you are so excited about the “The Electric Dick Screen Cleaner Cork Screw”. You could make money like “Mary Kay” does with make-up, you could start it up and then get all your friends to sell and all their friends and then you could support poor ole “moi” and Uncle Hunterman.

Earlene: Sorry ladies for the delay in getting back to ya'll...I was ordering my 2 ‘fer special and it took a little longer than I anticipated. I couldn’t understand Jose very well. It’s hard to translate between the Spanish and Redneck languages.

See ya’ll later at Wally World!

Earlene (Retta), Peaches (Jaclyn), Dolly Mae (Vici):